TULSA, OK—Stressing that the part-time administrative assistant should book a flight as soon as possible, sources confirmed this week that all of 28-year-old Hailey Allen’s problems stem from her never having visited Europe. “All her relationship hang-ups, low self-esteem, and failures at work would immediately disappear if Hailey finally experienced the grandeur of the La Sagrada Familia in Barcelona or tossed a coin into the Trevi Fountain in Rome,” said concerned sources, noting that every single one of Allen’s professional and personal issues could be resolved with even just a weekend spent exploring the streets of Paris. “The moment she...
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